the Corporation …

(1)

…is gabbing with the Politician

(2)

Corporation:  I saw that the President …

(3)

Corporation (cont.): … was on the Jimmy Fallon show, slow jamming the news.

click to view

 

Corporation:  Don’t you think it makes him look … well, too popular?

Politician:  Nah.  Nobody watches that show.  Besides, American Crossroads, that Karl Rove-linked organization is running an attack ad on the President, accusing him of being too much a celebrity.

click to play American Crossroads ad

 

 

Corporation:  Hmmm.  Well, I guess the ad will make the President look stupid to our base, they buy anything we say, but…

Politician:  But what?

Corporation:  How’s it going to play with the independent voter?

(4)

Politician:  The independent voter is discerning, they’ll get the message and come over to our side.

Corporation:  Yeah, but the ad makes the President look kinda cool, maybe it will backfire.

Politician:  You worry too much.

Corporation:  I have been worried.  I’m kinda depressed.

Politician:  Maybe you need a shrink.   I heard that Wall Street…

(5)

Politician (cont.):  … went to see that Internet Psychiatrist guy, that Dr. Phantom.

(6)

Corporation (whines) :  I don’t want some shrink poking around my brains…

Politician:  Quit your blubbering and go!

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the Banker

(1)

is angry!

(2)

he’s venting to the Politician

(3)

Banker:  Those goddamn shareholders wanna take me to court!

(4)

Politician:  Why?

Banker:  Ah, they don’t like the size of my pay package.

(5)

click here to read about Citigroup being sued by shareholder

Politician:  Well, the shareholders do have the right to vote on your pay package now.

Banker (furious) :  Yeah, thanks to the Dodd-Frank law – that’s your fault!

Politician:  Jeez.  Who knew that Dodd-Frank law would actually have any teeth?

(6)

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the Reporter

(1)

relents and goes to see Dr. Phantom

(2)

the Reporter lies back on the psychiatrist’s couch

(3)

Dr. Phantom:  What’s troubling you today?

Reporter:  The way Wall Street is being taken over by high speed traders!

Dr. Phantom:  What’s upsetting about that?

Reporter:  Wall Street is barely human as it is – now, the trend is for a guy at a computer…

(4)

Reporter (cont.) : … to set up algorithms and beat the market with sheer speed!

read about high speed traders and their effect on Wall Street here

Dr. Phantom:  And that bothers you?

Reporter:  It turns Wall Street into a high speed casino!

(5)

Reporter (cont.) :  Wall Street is at the heart of the collapse of our economy and Wall Street has not yet been held accountable!

Dr. Phantom:  You know, the Occupier ….

(6)

Dr. Phantom (cont.): … is trying to address that concern.

Reporter:  Why are you bringing him up?

Dr. Phantom:  Why do you think?

Reporter:  Are you trying to get me to talk about my love life?

Dr. Phantom:  What do you think?

Reporter:  I think you are passively aggressively prying into my personal life!

Dr. Phantom:  Does that bother you?

Reporter:  Hell, yeah!

Dr. Phantom:  Does the Occupier bother you?

Reporter:  Well, yes, he does!

Dr. Phantom:  Why is that?

Reporter:  Well, he thinks he can worm his way into my life!

Dr. Phantom:  Is that bad?

Reporter:  Look, he’s a visionary and a revolutionary and all that, but at the bottom of it all…

Dr. Phantom:  Yes?

Reporter:  He’s a nebbish!

(7)

Dr. Phantom:  You think he’s a fool?

Reporter (irritated) :  I’ve  had enough of this.  This is not addressing my concerns about high speed trading on Wall Street!

the Reporter gets up and leaves, disregarding the sign on the door

(8)

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the Reporter

(1)

is smiling

(2)

because the Trayvon Martin case will now be tried in a court of law, rather than in the media

but there are other things that worry the Reporter

(3)

she calls the Occupier

(4)

Reporter (to Occupier):  Did you hear about Laura Poitras, the journalist/filmmaker who keeps getting detained and interrogated at Crumbsville’s border?

Occupier:  No, what’s happening?

Reporter :  You can  read about it here

Occupier:  Jeez.  That’s chilling.  Fourth Amendment rights are being trampled.

(5)

Reporter:  It’s depressing.  I’m a journalist, too – and I’ve already been thrown in the clink during the Occupy evictions.

Occupier:  You should see my shrink.

Reporter:  Your shrink?  Why are you seeing a shrink?

Occupier:  Nothing wrong with a little support in these troubling times … a little self-examination doesn’t hurt either.

Reporter:  What’s his name?

Occupier:  Dr. Phantom (beat) He helps folks who have a hard time with bad news in Crumbsville.

Reporter (dubious) :  I don’t know, I’ll have to think about it.

(6)

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ring ring ring

(1)

the Occupier’s cell phone rings while the Occupier …

(2)

… is talking to Dr. Phantom

(3)

Occupier (into cell phone) :  Yeah.

it’s the Reporter!

(4)

the Occupier’s heart beats more quickly!

(5)

Reporter:  Did you hear what’s happening with George Zimmerman?

Occupier:  No, what’s going on?

Reporter:  His attorneys are quitting the case!  They have never even met Zimmerman, and now they don’t even know where he is!

Occupier:  What?!

Reporter:  He’s disappeared!

read about Zimmerman’s disappearance here

Occupier:  Jeez.  I guess that tarnishes his innocent image, doesn’t it?

(6)

Reporter:  Ya think?

Occupier:  Say, wanna join me for a drink?  I’m at a bar with a friend.

Reporter:  Anybody I know?

Occupier:  Don’t think so.  He’s my shrink.

Reporter (silence for a beat, then…) :  Nah, gotta go.  But thanks.

the Reporter hangs up

Dr. Phantom (to Occupier) :  A romantic interest?

Occupier:  Only in my dreams.

Dr. Phantom (narrows his eyes) :  Perhaps I can help.

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